ANGELS AND AIRWAVES

Overheard at The Victoria Secret Fashion Show backstage.

"We can't get this can open. See if Posh Spice is hanging around, maybe we can use her chin."

"Do these wings make my thong look small?"

"Seriously, girls, if you could just stop eating the Domino's pizza for ten seconds we can get things started."

"We're going to need some rope over here! One of the models fell into a hole in Seal's face!"

"Geri, I loved that movie made about your husband with Keira Knightley. Oh, wait, that was my husband, David Beckham."

"My idol? Dr. Izzie Stevens, of course."

"Everyone remember, we have Model U.N. tomorrow at my house. Adriana is bringing Rice Krispie Treats."

"I swear to God, if she pokes me with those wings one more time I'm throwing her off the walkway."

"Is that Doogie Howser?"

"What do you mean Tim Gunn isn't here?"

"Mel B, I love how all through Dancing With The Stars your famous soccer playing husband was there cheering you on. Oh, wait, your husband isn't a famous soccer player, mine is. Sorry."

"Help me! I stared directly at Seal's pants and now I'm blind!"

"Three kids? I don't look that good after three Tic Tacs. ****in' Germans."

"Is that Ryan Seacrest? ... is Seal on American Idol right now?"

"Marissa Miller's spilling out of her top. Yes, AGAIN."

"Mel C, congratulations on your husband becoming the highest paid footballer in America. Wait... your last name isn't Beckham, MINE is. Silly me."

"Model U.N. I just got that."

"Can we get another cameraman? Our's just fainted!"

"I just don't know. Maybe he wore a mask until Heidi agreed to marry him."

"Is this The Hives? Man, what happened to them?"

"Is that the third male lead from CSI: Miami? Seriously, are we just giving tickets away to anyone who shows up?"

"Geri, it's so great to have you back. I know how busy you must be, moving from England to America to be with your devastatingly handsome soccer god of a husband. Oh, I'm sorry did I say Geri? I meant me, Victoria."

"Could I please get some more feathers, jewelery AND beads on this bra please?"

"The Hanes outlet off the interstate is having a sale on bras tomorrow if anyone wants to go with me."

"Victoria, I just wanted to say how good it is to have you here. I hope the 4th season of your hit reality show goes as well as your marriage to a world famous singer. Oh waiiiiiit, that's ME. Now be a doll and open this can."