WORZALA'S WEDNESDAY WORD 11-1-06
Today's Wednesday Word is "limitations" as in "A man's gotta know his limitations."
Let me ask you a question. Say you're going to rob a liquor store. You plan the whole thing out all James Bond-y/Mission: Impossible style. Forget coming in the door. You're coming in through the roof like something out of Boondock Saints, right? So you wait until the store is closed and you make your entrance, and man what an entrance you make. BAM-O! Ceiling to Floor, 3 seconds, no stops. But that's not enough to stop you, you're a man on a mission. So after a quick minute or 5 laying on the tile floor you get back to business. And that business is robbery. And that business is goooood.
With me so far? Okay, so you've popped the cash register like the top of a longneck on a Friday, right? And you grabbed a couple of packs of smokes because, well, you've got a habit, but you're man enough to admit it. Now it's time to make like a tree and get the heck out of there. Exit stage left.
The only problem is the door doesn't want to cooperate. Plexiglass, the poor man's glass, is giving you more problems than a one armed man in a Cat's Craddle competition. No prob Bob, back out the roof. 4 minutes later, when you once again pick yourself up off the tile, you realize that you're going to need a plan B. And the "B" better stand for "Breaking Down That Door".
So first you grab a Beer Keg. Doesn't matter what kind of beer. Blatz, Milwaukee's Best Ice, Hamm's, whatev. Metal vs. Glass, Metal always wins. Toss! KLUNK! Man, your science teacher was full of crap, no wonder it took you three tries to get that GED. Well what tops beer keg? Hand cart. With the wheels you can really get that up to a pretty high rate of speed. CHARGE! KLUNK! Plexiglass is unimpressed and now you've got a bruised shin. Well what tops a hand cart? Short answer: Nothing. Long answer: Noooooooothing.
So now you're locked in a liquor store. No escape. They've got you on the surveillance camera robbing the place. What do you do? What can you do?
As Aristotle said when he was sentenced to death, "Smoke 'em if you've got 'em." Which is just what Larry Bynum did.
Let me ask you a question. Say you're going to rob a liquor store. You plan the whole thing out all James Bond-y/Mission: Impossible style. Forget coming in the door. You're coming in through the roof like something out of Boondock Saints, right? So you wait until the store is closed and you make your entrance, and man what an entrance you make. BAM-O! Ceiling to Floor, 3 seconds, no stops. But that's not enough to stop you, you're a man on a mission. So after a quick minute or 5 laying on the tile floor you get back to business. And that business is robbery. And that business is goooood.
With me so far? Okay, so you've popped the cash register like the top of a longneck on a Friday, right? And you grabbed a couple of packs of smokes because, well, you've got a habit, but you're man enough to admit it. Now it's time to make like a tree and get the heck out of there. Exit stage left.
The only problem is the door doesn't want to cooperate. Plexiglass, the poor man's glass, is giving you more problems than a one armed man in a Cat's Craddle competition. No prob Bob, back out the roof. 4 minutes later, when you once again pick yourself up off the tile, you realize that you're going to need a plan B. And the "B" better stand for "Breaking Down That Door".
So first you grab a Beer Keg. Doesn't matter what kind of beer. Blatz, Milwaukee's Best Ice, Hamm's, whatev. Metal vs. Glass, Metal always wins. Toss! KLUNK! Man, your science teacher was full of crap, no wonder it took you three tries to get that GED. Well what tops beer keg? Hand cart. With the wheels you can really get that up to a pretty high rate of speed. CHARGE! KLUNK! Plexiglass is unimpressed and now you've got a bruised shin. Well what tops a hand cart? Short answer: Nothing. Long answer: Noooooooothing.
So now you're locked in a liquor store. No escape. They've got you on the surveillance camera robbing the place. What do you do? What can you do?
As Aristotle said when he was sentenced to death, "Smoke 'em if you've got 'em." Which is just what Larry Bynum did.
Labels: Worzala's Wednesday Word
posted by Matt Worzala at
3:39 PM
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